I promised you all a post this weekend and by god I’m going to give it to you! So, following my last post, I had few requests to do a blog about fashion for us fabulous and fat ladies who want to look fierce. Now, those who know my, know that in the last few years, I have become obsessed with fashion and cycle through way more clothes than any reasonable person ever should. I feel like there is a time and place for every outfit on earth. However, I have been avoiding a conversation about fatshion and here is why. Inevitably, every time, someone asks me “can you tell me how to dress for my shape?” and this question is the bane of my existence. SO, I will talk about fatshion in a minute, but the social justicy/body positive person in me can’t pass up the opportunity to talk about the aforementioned question first.
What is wrong with “dressing for your shape”
- It implies that there is an ideal shape that you are trying to achieve. It’s drenched in tones of, how to do I erase my shape and make it look like something more pleasing to the eye?
- Dressing for your shape is filled with outdated and offensive tips like, ” you should wear black, it’s slimming” or “have you tried vertical stripes to make you look long and lean”
- It’s filled with shame and cover up. You don’t need to cover up your body or hide your natural shape.
- It buys into the idea that you owe it to someone to “carry your weight” a certain way ( another bane of my existence phrase. UGH)
Buying into dressing for your shape reinforces unrealistic expectations of what your body should look like. I have a friend who refuses to invest in the body positive movement, and she has explained to me that if she “had a figure like mine” that she wouldn’t mind being fat. To her, my body type is ideal. Which is silly. There is no wrong or right way to inhabit your body. End of story!
Okay so now! My top fatshion tips for looking fierce and living on a budget.
- Shop the sales: I know that this one may seem obvious, but here is the deal. I NEVER buy anything retail. I don’t care how bad I want it! I refuse. I will wait for a sale or I won’t get it. So, you need to learn sale cycles. For example. several times a year Cacique has their bra’s buy 2 get 2 free. That’s $80 off. Also, Lane Bryant, Deb, and Torrid all have special sales where they have an additional 50% or 60% off on their clearance. Today, I got all of this for 80 bucks.
- Buy versatile: Buy things that have more than one use. My favorite versatile piece is a black maxi skirt, where it as a tube dress with a waste belt, where it high wasted, where it on your hips, where it long with one side tied up. This one piece can be worn so many different ways that you can wear it everyday of the week and no one would know.
- Invest in your accessories: Accessories really are just as important as the clothes you buy. Accessories can completely change your entire outfit or just add that little splash of color that you need. My top 3 favorite accessories:
- Belts. Omg, I can not express to you how much I love belts. I have somewhere in the vicinity of 25. These can be worn with dresses, jeans, sweaters, over a tunic, over a cardigan with the cardi open. They can really make a difference in bringing your outfit together AND make you look put together,
- Scarves: Buy them, buy them all. Use them in your hair, around your neck, around your waste, tied in the belt loop of your jeans, or even tied on to the strap of your purse. This is one little accessory that can set you apart.
- Red Shoes: If you don’t have a pair of red shoes, run to the store immediately. Not only are they fierce as hell fire, but they are a great conversation starter. Every conference I go to , I wear my red shoes and I can’t tell you how many professionals from around the country I have met because my red shoes caught there eye.
- Be comfortable: Now, I don’t mean run around in your sweats. I mean that you have to feel comfortable with your body in what you are wearing. It’s not so much about physical comfort as mental comfort. If you feel uncomfortable or exposed in your wardrobe, it will show, and people will notice. If you want to be more daring, I suggest wear some more adventurous stuff around your house alone first, then around your friends, and then take it out in public. These baby steps really helped me strut in my first bikini.
and finally!!!!!!
- WEAR WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT! Seriously, fashion/fatshion is supposed to be fun. Stop worrying about what others think, and how you look, and whether or not people can see your fat rolls, and just put on the clothes you want to wear. Find your own style. Seriously! and if it isn’t out there, create it! I used to tell everyone my style was urban boho chic. Wait, that might actually be a thing now….Anyway. find what works for you and just do it, don’t be afraid to wear what makes you happy. If someone doesn’t like it, there is this really cool thing that was granted to humans, it’s called the ability to look away and mind your own damn business. BAM!
The sexiest and most beautiful thing you can wear is a smile and confidence. If you have those on, you’re good to go!